dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
