Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
