I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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