haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Randomize
