I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
