I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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