Sry I called you an 8
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
