I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
