I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
This toilet bowl is my home.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize