I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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