Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
