please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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