I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
