I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
