Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize
