And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
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