I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
