white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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