I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
it glows. i had to have it.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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