Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
