Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize