Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
