Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
