I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
