Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
