Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
