make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize
