can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
