all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
