could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
