She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
