maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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