the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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