I'm drive I can fine osifer
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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