Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
