D3 body, D1 cock
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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