so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Randomize