after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
