If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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