If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
