people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
