a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
