oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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