Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
