No, you can still breathe under the balls.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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