Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
