Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
