Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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