i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
