Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize